Thursday, January 18, 2018

I am a sinner

Yes, I will admit it.  I am a sinner, a hypocrit, a horrible mom and everything else. 

Some days are horrible.  Well actually it has been a bad week.  But today was the culmination of the week for me.  Chris has been so stressed over completing the work on the airplane that it is spreading like a terrible weed through our family. Well he finished the work and had to rush to get ready to fly to georgetown to get some supplies.  Well when he leaves in a rush like that, the kids get extra anxious and so do I. 

My little Cara was feeling it extra today and corey had no working ears today and was teasing his sister horribly.  Cara finally got mad and bit him. I just lost it. I spanked her, and put her on her bed and then got the hot stuff for her mouth to remind her not to bite.  Ugh... luckily the day didn't get worse.  But it didn't get much better.

Except my good friend from the village walked here and made me her special curry and taught me how to make bake.  She is a dear friend. 

Something I am learning is that no day will be good on this earth.  Not unless I am under God each and every moment. Yes I had my devotions this morning.  But that doesn't keep long.  No the devil just likes to attack.  Especially when there is extra stress like there has been all week. 

Please oh please God draw me close to you and keep wispering in my ear to ask you what to do.  Keep reminding me to remain under you.

I am ready for the peaceful days of heaven.  I'm ready for this stress and anxiety to be done.  I'm ready to be around people who truly love others like my friend from the village does.

Please God help me to endure till you come to take us home. Change my spirit and make me like you.